I’ve heard it from every. single. bride: “I just want to enjoy my wedding day.”
After photographing close to 150 weddings and being a bride myself, I’ve learned a thing or two that helps the statement above become a reality.
And the key is this: you.
You decide how you experience your wedding day because you’re the master of your own ship.
You can be reactive or proactive.
Choosing the latter, here are my top 3 tips on how to actually enjoy your wedding day…
- Set Yourself Up for Success:Structure your wedding week in a way that sets you & your emotions up for success. Greeting out-of-town guests & family members and still trying to work full time can be rough. If you can, request time off work starting Wednesday (if not earlier) if you’re having a Saturday/Sunday celebration.You’ll have a lot of last-minute errands, not to mention personal desires for having time for a nail & spa day, and being off work will help keep you grounded in being the bride.
- Choose Wisely: Only invite friends who you can truly relax with to be a part of your day-of wedding party. Being surrounded by your closest friends on the morning of your wedding is such a sweet, and meaningful time. Or it can be a nightmare.If you know you’re more reserved & could be more easily socially-exhausted, opt for an intimate bridal brunch the day before the wedding instead of having everyone get ready together day-of.Additionally, consider having your hair & makeup done in a separate room from all the flurry of the other girls.Play some chill music and enjoy a cup of coffee.
Your mind will be thinking about marrying your best friend, not how someone slept poorly last night or whose boyfriend is stuck in traffic. Protect your mental state & invite others in as is most fun & enjoyable for you.
- Rehearse Letting Go: The month leading up to your wedding can feel like a blur with appointments, fittings & final meetings – not to mention any work trips. Life doesn’t stop because you’re getting married.But you can help it slow down & practice becoming present in the midst of it. Like you do in mindfulness meditation, focusing on your breath can slow the stress down and help you become present with that current moment.The room.
The sounds you hear.
The thoughts in your head.And doing the same type of exercise in preparation for your wedding can be game-changing.
Breaking it Down – How to Let Go:
Choose an evening each week where, without exception, you can take a warm bath or curl up in a blanket with a favorite drink. And then practice saying out loud or journaling the 2 or 3 things that are out of your control and/or causing you the most stress.
Example: For my own wedding I was stressed if
1) my family would run late & cause a scene
2) the weather would be bad
3) my wedding party would make the timeline delayed, causing me to not have a lot of time for my First Look with Stephen.
I realized, in my bubble baths, that I couldn’t control the weather or if my adult friends & family would be responsible. However, I could control how I padded the timeline with extra time, how I organized details like purchasing umbrellas in case of rain, or how I communicated expectations about photo timing & needs. And I needed to mentally practice & verbally say it out loud:
- I can’t control if my siblings are late. But I can love that they will be there, celebrating with me.
- I can’t control the weather. But I can choose my attitude and still hug & kiss Stephen regardless of the weather! Ha!
- I can’t control if my wedding party will be good sports. But I can ask everyone to arrive 30 minutes earlier than they “need” to be, provide delicious food for breakfast as an incentive and gather a few extra toiletries in case someone forgets theirs.
I did this. For four weeks I practiced letting go. When it came to the Big Day itself, I was surprised at how easy it was for me to truly let go and enjoy myself, worry-free!
I remember so keenly becoming aware, standing in my wedding dress, how I could just BE the BRIDE. And soak up every literal second. I had done the prep work. And hired professionals to take all my details from there. All I needed to be was ME.
I credit those bubble baths, practicing becoming present, as the main reason I remember & LOVED every second of my 10+ hour wedding day.
Enjoying your wedding day and not having it blur by is absolutely possible. Hire a team of wedding professionals so you can focus on being the bride!
For more wedding-specific tips or to reserve your 2023 / 2024 wedding date on my calendar, reach out to me at hello@pattengalephotography.com! I’m here to help however I can!
Always,
–Tara M
TARA IS AN AWARD-WINNING PHOTOGRAPHER SERVING LUXURY WEDDINGS & COUPLES IN SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA & WANDERLUST DESTINATIONS.
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